Saturday, April 30, 2011

Church bulletin bloopers



The following are actual church bulletin board bloopers that were posted. Goes well with the funny church signs we posted earlier. Those were on purpose, were these?

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church.

The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.

Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 p.m. Please use the back door.

The third verse of Blessed Assurance will be sung without musical accomplishment.

The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."

Twenty-two members were present at the church meeting held at the home of Mrs. Marsha Crutchfield last evening. Mrs. Crutchfield and Mrs. Rankin sang a duet, The Lord Knows Why.

During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit.

The music for today's service was all composed by George Friedrich Handel in celebration of the 300th anniversary of his birth.

Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.

A song fest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday.

Don't let worry kill you off - let the church help.
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